OOOh my first advice for a dude! This might be a challenge.
I fail at approaching women lately (shy-ish?) and I’ve been out of the dating/making out/flirty fun scene for a looong time now. I used to be awesome at flirting and getting dates in the past. But I also feel I won’t have time for a great girl for another 6 months or so…what ever shall I do to remedy this? Is online the way to go these days?
-Missin’ the Kissin’
(This first sentence should be read in a southern accent, just FYI.) Flirting is like riding a bike, once you get back on the saddle your muscles just do what comes natural. My advice is to go out and flirt with some women. These can even be women whom you’d never date, you know, square types, older women or women out of your scene. You’d be surprised how many friendly ladies are out there that just like the attention and don’t really want much else other than a nice chat at a bar with a cool dude. That takes the pressure off and allows you to practice without fear of rejection.
Speaking of fear of rejection… that’s unfortunately a part of why flirting becomes more difficult the older we get. After years of broken hearted loneliness and rough break ups, people in their 30s or older are all so scared of the outcome of things, when really flirting is supposed to just be a fun way to pass the time and if something comes up out of it then, well, that’s awesome! In order to flirt properly you have to get over that fear and just enjoy the moment.
Online dating is a way to get your flirty juices flowing, it’s true, but it’s difficult because chatting with someone online can be so easy, yet seeing them in person can freak you out, especially if they are like a foot shorter and a few pounds heavier than they claimed to be on their OK Cupid profile and they failed to mention that they are missing an ear and have a skin disease or something. Still I know a ton of people who have met online and have awesome relationships so it might be worth a shot.
As far as not having the time for something real, however, let’s get honest for a sec. If you met someone really special, you’d make the time. Because you’d want to and you would try desperately to make it happen no matter how busy you are. So don’t let that stop you. Go out there and be your awesome self. Allow yourself to be open to possibility, yet open to the idea that it might take some patience and hard work.
Ps, when you can’t think of anything else, just buy the girl a damn drink. Girls love that shit and it makes you look like a modern day Humphrey Bogart, no matter what. I mean just look at this dude… he wasn’t the freshest peach of the pick, yet he slew ladies left and right cause the dude had class and knew when to buy a girl a goddamn drink. (and also when to throw it in her face.)